So now our big secret is finally out… Mackenzie and I were so happy to share with you the next part of our adventure and hugely touched by all of your loving and positive responses – thank you so much!
I’m going to share with you guys some more details about how I found my first trimester, and specifically, what caught me by surprise. Hopefully I can help prepare other mothers-to-be so that you don’t have to worry about whether what you experience is ‘normal’ or not like I did.
1. How suddenly the exhaustion and nausea hits
I had my first scan on the early side, at just over 6 weeks. I smugly told my doctor I had no sickness and felt great (having just worked my way through Cannes Film Festival and flown 11 hours home). She looked at me knowingly and said, “hmm – if it’s going to hit, it’ll start about now”… Sure enough, the very next day, I woke up wanting to vomit, and I started sleeping like I was going for a World Record in napping. It really did come on as instantaneously as that. It was tough, I’m not going to lie. I wanted to be sick all day, and all night, and actually lost weight over those first few weeks because I couldn’t stomach much (watch it all on my vlog here!). But happily, the sickness left as swiftly as it was brought on: at just over 12 weeks. I remember vividly waking up one morning, we were in England at my family home, and I smelled toast and wanted it. I did not want to hurl, which was amazing! I’ve never been so grateful just to feel normal again!
2. Your sense of smell goes nuts
My mum had told me she couldn’t bear the smell laundry powder when she was pregnant with me, and Dad had always joked that was her way of getting out of doing the laundry! But pregnant women having a heightened sense of smell is so real. And not always in a good way… Unfortunately, everything made me want to barf. I had to hold my nose when I put on my moisturizer and stop using one particular perfume for a few weeks. I could not deal with opening the fridge, and omg – if someone walked by me with BO? I just couldn’t breathe. Some Saturday nights when Mackenzie went out with the boys, I banished him to the spare bedroom because the alcohol fumes were so poignant to me – and that was after only a few beers (or so he says, LOL).
3. I felt very alone
Don’t get me wrong, Mackenzie, his mum and my parents have been amazing and checked in on me the whole time, but I was longing to let friends know why I wasn’t coming out and to ask other friends if they had felt this way, if it went away, and what might help me feel better. Yes of course, it was our choice not to tell people, but we wanted to be cautious and keep our privacy for as long as possible. P.S. don’t spend too long on Google, because the pregnancy chat forums can get very confusing and overwhelming, and make you feel even more alone. Best to save questions for your doctor or your mum.
4. Exercise saved me
Not only from an energy perspective, but from making me feel less alone and more sane when I had spent 2 or 3 days holed up in the house like a zombie. It was great to go to a class, know that I was protected by an experienced instructor, and get the blood flowing. At my worst, I managed perhaps two pilates classes and a barre class per week (Physique57 is my fave), but I learned to take things at my own pace (check out the vlog here to hear about a funny story at pilates!). One time, I was all dressed and walking out our front door when I just had to sit down as I was feeling sick again, and I knew I couldn’t – and shouldn’t – push myself too much. So that was the only class I bailed on, and Mackenzie took me through some stretches in the garden instead.
5. I worried a lot about miscarriage
And I still do! But I think the high risk of miscarriage in the first trimester really made us both refrain from talking about becoming parents too much. Obviously, that was just us – other couples should, of course, do, say and feel exactly as they please! But even now, Mackenzie isn’t keen on me getting tempted to buy any baby clothes… we are just taking things week by week and not planning too far ahead with names and nurseries just yet.
That said… it’s all totally worth it. Every single moment – even those times at which I felt sick to my stomach – are special in the knowledge that a little life is growing inside of me! I feel incredibly lucky and blessed to be pregnant and am in awe at this amazing process, what incredible beings we are. I can’t wait to meet our little one in January 2018!
I’ll be posting more about pregnancy as we get further through my term, including a round up like this for my second trimester. In the meantime, make sure you’re subscribed to my Youtube channel where we’ll be sharing more vlogs.